Do you know how to manage conflicts at home through assertiveness rather than aggressiveness? The problem with managing conflict at home or even at work, through aggressive communication, is that it can lead to anger and violence. Why? It does not allow the other a to manage conflict through assertive communication.
If you truly want to develop more effective assertive communication, you have develop the ability to listen to both sides of an encounter or story. You cannot agree with just one person, then ignore others. When you actively listen to others you will be catch both body language and spoken language. This will help you gain a deeper understanding of the underlying meta-messages that could be driving your conflict.
When you have a better understanding why your friend, child, co-worker or spouse is angry, you will know when to encourage them and when to take a firmer stand with them. This will help you put out small fires before they burn down the house.
Take a look at the skills mentioned above and see how you rate yourself on these. Is there room for improvement and are you prepared to take action in order to develop better conflict management skills?
Assertive conflict management is having the ability to recognize and deal with disputes in a rational and balanced way, while respecting the views and rights of others. Don’t try to be a tyrant or someone who never admits that they could be wrong. When dealing with a conflict it is vital that you face this in a calm manner. Apply the three Cs of assertive communication to your daily encounters with others. This means that you have to allow your confidence that you can handle any situation sip through your encounter with others. the other 2 cs of assertive communication are clarity and control. Don’t yell!
When you think about it, people have to work together and everyone has different opinions, so conflicts are only a natural part of the process. At work you have to share desks, resources, and common goals as well as having to work together with people with different personalities and cultures.
At home conflict can occur because of different perspectives and approaches to solving problems between spouses or generational differences between children and their parents. The first step towards effective assertive management is listening to others to get a better understanding of their world view, thoughts and opinions. The great thing is that when others feel that you have listened to them and considered their fears and concerns, they are more likely to listen to you and have less conflict with you.